My customers are a big part of what makes my job enjoyable! However, there is that small percentage that makes it challenging and sometimes a living hell. These individuals, we call, The Problem Children.
Problem Children are reoccurring, former customers who have been permanently kicked out, also known as 86’d. Unlike most people who are 86’d from establishments, these particular customers keep trying to come back, even after being relentlessly told not to. We have Problem Children who were banned several years ago who still make multiple attempts to fool the new hires. Unbeknownst to them, the reoccurring Problem Children are the first ones we make sure the newbies are familiar with.
Now, before I continue...to appease the masses, I want to make sure it’s understood that my viewpoint on individuals experiencing homelessness, addiction, and mental health issues is not being painted in an unfair and biased light. I have experienced the trifecta of these issues. I used to be that homeless drug addict sleeping on the streets. So, before anybody passes judgment with unfair or prejudiced accusations, I have witnessed firsthand what that particular clientele goes through. Although it has made me more empathic towards those still suffering, I have a job to do, a business to run, and people to protect.
I do have customers that are still homeless and addicted to various substances that don’t cause me problems. Some of them are my favorite customers, and a few have become my friends. They sometimes help me remove a particularly stubborn, belligerent, or dangerous customer, and I couldn’t be more grateful for them. They are some of the most genuine and wonderful people I’ve ever known.
Since we lack security or a bouncer at the store I run, we all must learn to be comfortable with confrontation and learn to de-escalate a potentially dangerous situation. The hardest part of being a new hire is to learn and understand the balance of being firm—but not unreasonable—to customers who break the rules. Unfortunately, the only way to learn is through trial and error, and it’s not easy. You can always spot the veterans who have been in the business for a long time and have honed their tactics to perfection. But sometimes, even the most seasoned workers are no match for these people.
An interaction with a Problem Child usually comes with phases. Depending on the severity of the individual’s past behavior, it starts with an immediate fight-or-flight instinct. The rush of adrenaline when you are preparing yourself to make smart choices amid an emergency is not a feeling you can recreate. But all you can do is prepare yourself.
Not too long ago, I had one of our troublemakers throw a rock through our window. He became angry at me when he attempted to sneak past me into the store without me noticing. Not being able to hide from me, I reminded him that he wasn’t allowed on the premises and that he needed to leave. This was enough for him to throw a temper tantrum that even Veruca Salt would envy. He did end up leaving, but no more than three minutes later, I heard this horrible crashing sound. My gut knew what that sound was before my brain could even comprehend what was happening. Since I had three customers on the floor, I switched into crisis mode and ran to lock the door. Peering out past the door, I saw that same Problem Child who attempted to come in. This time, he was armed with rocks. Unfortunately, before I was even connected to the city’s emergency dispatching line, Problem Child was nowhere to be found. Even after the process of filing a police report, there isn’t a whole lot left to do.
My first Christmas season at the store I now run is one of my best stories. I was still relatively new, having been there only a few months. I had worked at a different store in another part of the same city for a little over a year. Because it’s hard to find decent people to work at any adult store and to stay for longer than a few months, promotions can happen relatively quickly if you work hard. And although part of the same company, each individual store is vastly different than the other. It took me the better part of a year to get fully settled at my new location. With that being said, sometimes it takes an experimental approach to find out who is and who isn’t allowed within the premises.
Earlier that week, I had already left work when I received a call from my night shift employee. They told me that there was a known Problem Child who refused to leave the area. He was previously in the store but was now hanging out at the entrance blocking foot traffic. A call to the police was already made, but they wanted some backup since this person had already been proven to be violent.
I headed back to the store, crossing the one main street that separates the nice part of the city from the gritty neighborhood where my store is located. As I rounded the corner, I recognized the man loitering at the entrance from his most recent mugshot. Even though I knew it was a fruitless attempt, I approached him and politely asked him to leave, and as I expected, he refused. I asked again, this time adding an edge to my voice. He answered with a slew of insults meant to get under my skin. My employee saw me and unlocked the door, letting me in the store. Already on the phone with the police, all we could do was wait it out.
In most cases, the perpetrator will leave before help arrives. Often, it’s a relief, but for repeat offenders, it’s disheartening because they will be back again and again and again. However, this guy stayed long enough for a police officer to arrive. The guy saw the officer coming and tried to run but ended up being restrained, yet continued to thrash around. We then both gave our official statement and went on with our lives.
A couple of days went by, and on a relatively slow weekday, the door alarm went off, indicating that someone had entered the store. I looked up from what I was doing to greet the customer, but instead, I was greeting the same guy from that night the police were called. The Problem Child ignored my protests and headed for the arcade; I immediately called 911. Because I had already pressed charges against the guy, the arrival time would be much faster. In less than 20 minutes, two police officers walked in. I handed them the keys to the arcade, and they headed into the back. In this circumstance, I locked the front door. The handful of times that we’ve needed a police response in the arcade, it always ends up killing arcade foot traffic for obvious reasons. The arcade is a very delicate ecosystem that thrives on a delicate balance of having the right environment. Once that environment is disrupted, it kills everything. It also looks poorly upon the establishment, having law enforcement on the premises.
As the two police officers headed to the back, I remained at the counter and tried to stay out of the way. At first, I heard some unintelligible voices and then a loud bang, followed by yelling. One of the officers called my name, and I ran into the back. Since the arcade is supposed to be dark, with only several ill-defined red and purple lights, it was hard to make out what was going on. As my eyes adjusted to the dark, I saw one officer pinning the trespasser down. One of the officers asked if there was a way to turn a brighter light on, which of course, I couldn’t, and told her so. There was some more shouting, and I ran to grab one of our flashlights. Before I had even reached the counter, there was another loud banging sound, and the two officers emerged from the arcade; one of them had a bruised and bloody eye. Someone had obviously hit him in the face. It was—you guessed it—the Problem Child.
Luckily for me, this guy made the stupid decision to punch a police officer in the face and was sent to prison. I even had to testify at his sentencing trial, and so far, I’ve never seen him again—a rare end to a common Problem Child tale. Atticus Rexx is a Portland native, wanna-be graphic artist, and a gutter punk at heart who never left the ’90s. When she isn’t writing, she can be found bouncing from one unfinished project to another or running a porn store. Find Atticus Rexx on Instagram @quinzelaple.
