It’s a thankless job, indeed. One no sane human—or even anthropoid—would continually undertake. Imagine having to originate exciting, cutting-edge subject matter, writing it with layperson appeal, and pressing ahead month after month...all without any notable recognition. "Sign me up!" right?
Yes, folks, it’s a brand new year, and I’d like to start it by showing my gratitude for our writers. If you’re waiting for the drumroll and symbol crash of sarcasm, you’ll be disappointed because I’m truly expressing my unfeigned appreciation and admiration.
That said, this issue marks a milestone for our very own Blazer Sparrow—his five-year anniversary! That’s almost 60 different masterpieces from him (I say almost because there were a few months he never sent us a submission). One was when he went on a three-week CBD gummy binger through the rough streets of Sellwood. Then, there was the time he thought he could start a local Witch House band, but when the Space Room refused to book him, his dreams were shattered. Notwithstanding, we still love you, Blazer!
While we’re at it, we’d like to recognize the rest of our writers! Hannah One Cup has been with us for over two years, Esmeralda Rupp-Spangle for over four years, and Wombstretcha...well...over ten years of tommyrot and shenanigans! A big thanks to all of you—we appreciate you!
Once again, our industry’s biggest night did not disappoint. The Finals of Miss Exotic Oregon 2023 was filled with amazing performances, and the bar continues to be raised year after year!
A special congratulations goes to Miss Exotic Oregon 2023, Nia, representing Golden Dragon. Way to go, glamour-puss—you slayed it!
Be sure to check out our full coverage of The Finals, starting on page 34, with a special interview with Nia on page 36.
Happy New Year, and here’s to an amazing 2023!
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SUN 01—SINFERNO CABARET
FRI 06—THE LOUNGE—PIRATES OF THE CARIBOOTY (ROUND 1)
SAT 07—DREAM ON SALOON—PIRATES OF THE CARIBOOTY (ROUND 2)
SUN 08—SINFERNO CABARET
SAT 14—THE VENUE—PIRATES OF THE CARIBOOTY (ROUND 3)
SUN 15—SINFERNO CABARET
FRI 20—THE VENUE—PIRATES OF THE CARIBOOTY (ROUND 4)
SAT 21—X EXOTIC LOUNGE—PIRATES OF THE CARIBOOTY (ROUND 5)
SAT 21—STARS CABARET (SALEM)—WET & WILD BEACH PARTY
SAT 21—LUCKY DEVIL—PIXIE'S BIRTHDAY PARTY
SAT 21—HAWTHORNE STRIP—MEADOW'S BIRTHDAY PARTY
SUN 22—SINFERNO CABARET
SAT 28—GUILTY PLEASURES—PIRATES OF THE CARIBOOTY (FINALS)
SAT 28—DEVILS POINT—AXEL'S BIRTHDAY BASH
SUN 29—SINFERNO CABARET
DAILY—CABARET—HAPPY HOUR—2PM-6PM
DAILY—COLUMBIA STRIP—HAPPY HOUR—4PM-7PM
DAILY—DEVILS POINT—HAPPY HOUR—3PM-6PM
DAILY—Dv8—HAPPY HOUR—NOON-3PM
DAILY—LUCKY DEVIL—HAPPY HOUR—3PM-6PM